An ego is not something a person develops on purpose; it’s a part of everyone’s personality that develops naturally, especial in conjunction with success. And unchecked ego can end up being detrimental to your success, and you should take careful steps to make sure it doesn’t get out of control.
Ego wants recognition but does not want to work for it.
As they say, actions speak louder than words, so why is it that We love to feel popular or be praised even for things we haven’t done? Ego wants the fame and recognition but does not get into the deeds that had to be performed to deserve It.
Let’s look at this concept:
Fame and Recognition are what you receive when you’re successful…
Yet there are so many people that want to achieve fame before they achieve success.
- Ego VS Ambition Ambition is based on actual achievements, learning and growing to reach your goals.
There is a great quote that always bounces around in my head. “The definition of luck is when preparation meets opportunity.”Preparation is hard work; you’re doing the chore without any of the glory, you are learning and growing so when you have the opportunity you will be able to do what is needed. There is no instant gratification.Be careful what your shooting for. Make sure to prepare for the job you’re eye is on.
- Rain in your ego: always realize there is more to learn. Greek philosopher Epictetus once said, “It’s impossible to learn that which one already knows.” We need to be humble and realize that we don’t know it all. This works well with the idea of having a growth Mindset. Knowing that you are always learning and growing. For more about a growth, mindset read the book Mindsets by Carole Dweck. I personally look at the world as if I am from another planet and I am researching these people on this planet. This sounds silly, but for me it makes me pay attention to all the things I don’t know about, and I learn new things about what I already know.You can think that you’re a student of life and that there is always someone better than you, so you can either get a mentor or even better teach a protégé. Having a more successful peer to learn from is a great way to get insight and lessons specific to your path. Teaching is a great way to see the full spectrum of your abilities as you help a beginner.
- Pride keeps us deaf to the warning and blind to things we could improve. What if Steve Jobs rested on his laurels after inventing the Apple2 computer? Well, we probably would not have the iPhone! So what happens to us when we rest on out laurels after success? This is a sign of pride! Pride and ego are not the same things. Pride feeds our ego. Telling us that this single success justifies how special we are. We are patting ourselves on the back to the point where we don’t see that there is room for improvement.Pride doesn’t just hinder our path to learn and achieve it also makes us more sensitive to criticism and warnings. Have you ever seen how sensitive or even aggressive a proud person gets when they are being told they are not as special as they think they are, their ego can’t hear that they are not the best?Benjerman Frankland once learned this lesson the hard way… he was in Boston and one of the town’s most respected figures Cotton Mather called out to him “Stoop Stoop” Franking thought he was above this gesture and ignored him and proceeded to slam his head into the low door frame.
You can save yourself the pride pitfall by being humble. Humble is an amazing way to look at life in general. Most people respect a humble person more that flashy anyway.
- Learn to delegate tasks and trust that your team and staff can do the work without your micromanagement. Your ego will tell you that you’re the only person that can do a task, so you don’t delegate your task to the people you hired to do these tasks. Trust in them and realize that you can trust that they will do the job. Practice delegating and put that ego aside. You will learn that you will have more time to do new things. If you don’t delegate, you can devastate your company.think about micromanaging your staff to the point that they cant make a move without your approving of ever little step. Then you get a large project that will take a lot more of your attention; the staff can’t get as much accomplished because your ego created a bottle net for a decision that is you! Trust your people and let them take on the responsibilities needed. This will help them grow as well as help you learn new things.
- Don’t hog the praise: For every success, I give credit to the team, the individuals who made sure I was able to do what is needed. In rugby, there is a saying that it take 15 men to make a tri. There are no stars in Rugby it’s the team, even if you are put into the spotlight you praise your brothers on the field. I use this in my career. If I get praise, I give my praise to the people who made if possible. I would not have accomplished the task without them, so I need to point them out. This has a positive side effect: your team will like working with you, and you will attract new coworkers. Being humble is a skill to hone and keep for life.
If you do your best and things just don’t work out, find out why, so you can do better next time. We all have had an unsuccessful endeavor, whether it is an interview for a job that you did not get, a rejection from a sales pitch or in my case a bad set or talk.
We need to recognize we can not control all outcomes and that an unexpected result should be looked at as an opportunity to honestly look at our performance. On the other side, we need to remember that lucky breaks are not the same as success from hard work. We need, to be honest about our results.